Zombie on the Brain

 

In "My Zombie, Myself", Chuck Klosterman uses the word zombie to refer to something that always keeps coming back to us in life. No matter how hard we try we just can't kill it. we know how to and the process is the same every time, we just can't bring ourselves to do it.

My "zombie" is my depression and anxiety. I'm not using it as an excuse for all of my actions but it certainly is driving a good majority of them. I know what to do to defeat these zombies but I can't. I take the medication, talk about what I'm feeling, get all the support I need yet I still can't do it. I stay in bed for hours not being able to do anything just because I can't bring myself to do it, then I worry that I'm going to be a failure for all the stuff that I'm not doing that I need to. It's a cycle and it just keeps repeating.

Now, this zombie isn't here all the time. It comes and goes and breaks are greatly accepted but generally short and sweet. The most important thing that I've learned on how to beat this zombie is to not let it be a part of myself. I am myself, not just a person fighting depression and anxiety.

I want to be able to get better and defeat this zombie but I need to know that it's going to take a very long time and is almost nearly impossible. They don't call it a "zombie apocalypse" for nothing. The best advice I can give for someone fighting a zombie, is that once you realize what it is that you're fighting, your battle is already halfway done. Keep faith and look in front of you. Don't judge your progress by how many more zombies are still coming but how many you've had the strength to kill.